Becoming Part of the Club: My Unexpected Type 1 Story

Life without Diabetes... gosh, can I even remember what that feels like? I almost measure the timeline of my life so far as 'before Diabetes' and 'after Diabetes'... Life must have felt so simple then, but how would I have known when I had nothing to compare it to? It's almost like when you have a head cold and think to yourself, 'I didn't know how lucky I was to NOT have this head cold and be able to breathe through my nose properly!'. I sometimes think back and kick myself, 'Beth, you didn't know how lucky you were, you should have been more grateful to have a working pancreas’. However, I must say... Life after a diagnosis such as this really does give you a fresh perspective in terms of gratitude. I am so incredibly lucky to be able to live a healthy and fulfilling life with my long-term condition thanks to the discovery of insulin, just over a 100 years ago and the technology that is rapidly advancing. I adore my Omnipod® 5 and Dexcom G7 HCL and don’t know how I ever lived without it!

Being diagnosed with type 1 diabetes at 20 years of age was earth-shattering to say the least. I had just made it through my teenage years and thought I was finally learning who I was as an adult, enjoying my life at university and feeling like a 'grown-up'. I had just started my second year at university when I received the news that my little sister, Grace, who was 12 years old at the time, had been diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. I was gobsmacked at this news, as my best friend, Ellen had lived with the same condition since she was 6 years old. I knew the angst that Ellen had to endure through her teenage years, already struggling with hormones (as teenage girls do!), never mind a long term, relentless condition on top of this! So, I was extremely concerned about my baby sister's mental health and how this would affect her future in terms of self-belief, self-esteem and confidence... Grace was an active child who loved dance, musical theatre and sport... 'What is she going to do!?' I thought, in despair... Little did I know, that in just 9 days time, I myself would be diagnosed with the same condition.

I went from thinking I knew who I was, a fully formed adult, to feeling like a shell of myself. From feeling confident in my body, to feeling numb, like I didn’t recognise myself anymore. From feeling fit and healthy to not trusting my organs to keep me alive… ‘How on earth am I ever going to inject myself every time I was to eat?’ I asked Ellen, drowning in my own tears. ‘I promise Beth, one day it will just get easier’. If I am being totally honest, as much as I wanted to believe her, I just couldn’t. I stared at my stomach in disbelief every time had to inject, wondering when the nightmare would end. Something I will never forget was waking up every morning in the month after my diagnosis, pinching myself and praying that it was all a nightmare.

Ellen and I laugh about it now, but at the time I remember telling her I would never be able to go to the nightclub with her again or go for ice cream in the Summer. I had total tunnel vision; I was forgetting the fact that my best friend who was sitting beside me with the same condition was already doing all of these things and more! She was living a fulfilled life, learning how to drive, studying marketing at university and even participating in the cheerleading team! I just had to grieve the old me and feel my way through the darkness before I could see the light. Looking back, I am glad I did this, as it meant I had time to fully heal and accept the diagnosis before jumping back in and saying ‘yes’ to life again.

It felt strange to go from being an ‘ally’ of Ellens, supporting her form the sidelines, to then become part of the club, and live with the condition myself. From being there for her when she had her hypos at cheerleading practice, to being the one on the floor waiting for a full sugar mini coke can to be presented to me. From comforting Ellen, the time someone online posted on their Instagram story, ‘This dessert would give you Diabetes’, to sharing the anger with her at the lack of understanding and stereotypes seen in the media.

Ellen and her Family were such a support my sister Grace and I, giving us the ‘crash course’ we so needed to get us through the whirlwind period of diagnosis… More than anything, it gave me hope that I could still say ‘YES’ to life and chase my dreams.

I know I am in a unique position to have my best friend in the world live with the same condition as me, and I am so grateful for the universe for bringing us together to not only support each other, but to go on to create the empire that is now ‘The Diabetic Duo’. I always say, Type 1 Diabetes is the worst thing that has ever happened to me, but also in a weird way… also the best!